"Mistakes are part of the dues one pays for a full life." ~Sophia Loren "I never make stupid mistakes. Only very, very clever ones". ~John Peel It has been my experience that the fear of making a mistake is one of the main ways people keep themselves from living to the fullest, from living outrageously. Yet what is a mistake, really? Who says it is a mistake? A mistake is something that, we or someone else, judges as wrong, either the wrong action, the wrong course to take or the wrong interpretation or understanding of something. And so what! Many times what we label as a mistake is simply that we tried something and found that it didn't work out the way we hoped. One of my clients said, "It was a mistake to get involved with her in the first place." "But was it really?" I asked. "Well, I did not enjoy it in the end and after a few months I broke it off in frustration." he replied. "Ok, so how else could you look at it?" I asked him. "I guess I could say I found out that she really didn't meet my requirements. In fact I learned about a new requirement that I didn't know I had." Yeah! And that is great information that you can take and use to help you make a better choice. Is the fear of making a mistake keeping you from doing something you want? Is it keeping you from going anywhere, with anyone you want? What if you were willing to let go of wanting things to turn out a certain way? What if you decided it was ok to have an outcome that you did not expect? How could your life or your relationships be fuller or richer if you were willing to look foolish from time to time in an effort to experience more? Sometimes people do not pursue activities or relationships because they ask, "Why bother? I don't know where this is going to lead." What are they really saying here? Perhaps they are saying, "Well I don't want to put out the effort if I am not going to get the result I want." That is simply and excuse to not putting one's self fully into the activity or the relationship. What could happen if you did put yourself fully into the experience and let go of any attachment to the outcome? In other words not be afraid of making a mistake. When you let go of your judgments of how a thing has to be, you may be surprised at what can happen. |
